I have no idea how I lucked into my relationship with my wife, and even less of an idea of why she keeps me around. I think she is just aiming low, and I’ll take it! :D
Also, for you long time readers don’t fret. Shirt Shield isn’t gone, the cow in today’s shirt is based off a joke I made on twitter about making a Magic: the Gathering parody called MOOgic: The GatHERDing. It’s a terrible pun thats semi relevant due to the lawsuit of Hex.
Did I mention you should follow me on Twitter, oh and on Facebook, and Tumblr too if you like.
Thanks for reading!
-Wesley
Don’t ever forgot how lucky you are… you gotta make sure you stay as awkward as possible to keep her on her toes.
There are sooooo many possibilities for MOOgic…. don’t gve up on that dream parody.
In it you all play plainswalkers who get there moogic from one of the five Moona types (Chocolate milk, Regular Milk, Strawberry Milk, Water, or Grass Shake) and the more moona you have the strong the members of the herd you can summon like the giant RED Bull who is never “Tipped” even when he goes into battle!
Dear Wes,
What do I do if I start feeling less-awkward, more comfortable and more confident? I’m not married yet, but I don’t want to lose my girlfriend by not being awkward enough. Help!
P.S. Good luck with MOOgic! Some day may we all “cud”dle up with our loved ones and play!
Signed,
“Debonair in Desmoines”
P.P.S. I am not really from Desmoines.
Dear Debonair,
You are in a dangerous place and I’m glad you’ve come to me for help. Did you know that confident, loving, and trusting relationships are the ones that are most likely to fail!
What you need to do is to push yourself into an awkward zone. For example agree to see a movie with her and then watch it the night before, but don’t tell her till the movie is just about to start. Alternatively, you can whisper a deep dark fear you have to her right before you fall asleep, or forget any and all major holidays, works great with birthdays!
This will ensure an awkward relationship and will really press her into forgiving you more. It’ll be awesome!
P.S. I too hope MOOgic takes off, as I would jump over the moon if it did!
Enjoy your New Awkward Relationship,
Nameless in Nashville
P.P.S. I’m truly from Nashville